Category: Assignment #3

4. For question #2, what did you do differently from the original post? Please outline, explain and justify what you changed & why. Essentially, what did you learn from this new topic and what did you change and why. (8 Marks)

From my original introduction, there are a few things that I had to change. Starting with that very first line of text being the headline. I reviewed my feedback, and I needed to improve my first line to make mre attention grabbing. It definitely needed to have more details to tell the readers what my business is about. Adding in Pilates and Yoga to this headline helps the reader know what to expect before they actually start reading. From what we learned in class about headlines and plain language, this needed to catch attention but also be easy to understand for the reader. The second thing I did differently was refactoring my paragraph into short paragraphs. I’ve learned not to have any large pieces of text because, realistically, no one enjoys reading content like that. This was another point in my feedback to have bold text, short paragraphs and strategic formatting, which I made sure to have in my new post. I accomplish this by first dividing everything I already wrote into sections that re write, including bloated subheadings, and a section with bullet points. The section I have known with bullet points is on what makes the studio special. These points are on the studios offering like the class levels, Mat Pilates, Yoga and the Wellness Bar. This action is made intentionally for people who scan because they break down useful information to get. The last change that I made was when I was writing. I kept in mind Plain English to ensure this whole post is easy for someone who might be completely new to the world of fitness. Overall, I’m happy with how my new introduction post looks now and feel like it follows the F-Pattern and incorporates Plain English.

3. For question #2, explain how your new post successfully addresses the three main objectives of Plain English writing as discussed in class. Provide a detailed breakdown of each objective. (9 Marks)

a. Describe one specific technique you used to improve readability in your revised version and explain why it is effective. (4 Marks)

One specific technique I used was adding bullet points. My original content was in a paragraph, so something that I learned in classes is that breaking everything into sections makes it a lot easier for a user to read and understand. Bullet points are great for this because, for a lot of people, bullet points are so much easier and just more pleasant to read. Again, speaking from my personal experience, actually having a learning disability, reading a bullet point compared to a large paragraph is less overwhelming. They also significantly help with scalability because we all know that when we read, we tend to just scan for important information. Bullet point break up this information into small sections, making it easy for people to identify what is important. Overall, I know that in my revised version, breaking down some of that large block of information into point form will improve my readability. 

b. What was the most challenging aspect of applying the F-Pattern and Plain English writing principles? How did you overcome it? (5 Marks)

In my first vision of the F-Pattern, I followed the inverted pemided method but left out more important information I learned about this writing style. I found it a challenge to fully restructure my writing into the correct format. I identity reconized that that one large paragraph should be broken up into sections. It will just change to now add some subtitles and ofcoures where to include bullet points. I had to really think about how we read, like how we first read the top, then skim for information in the rest, then read the bottom. I also added in bold text, which helps the reader identify each of those sections. For Plain English writing, I made sure everything my cear, simple and easy for anyone to understand. Ensuring I wasn’t dragging on any sentence and keeping my vocabulary simple, like no long words that someone not familiar with the fitness industry would understand. Overall, the most challenging aspect that a rian into was breaking up my content, and what I have to do is add subheads and bullet points to make my content more effective with my audience.

2. In a previous assignment, you wrote an introduction article in the “F” pattern. Based on what we discussed in class and based on the feedback provided in class, write a new introductory “content” incorporating “plain English writing for the web” in the “F” pattern including visuals. You are to include your “revised version” (if the version you submitted was not in the F-Pattern). Ensure that it addresses the three main objectives of plain English writing. As a reminder, this is an introductory post for your business. Ensure you list it in your hardcopy. (12 Marks)

New introductory content:

Mindful Moving Wellness

Welcome to Where Movement Meets Mindfulness Through Pilates and Yoga

A Space Designed For Everyone

At Mindful Moving Wellness, we believe that fitness can be for everyone, no matter how much experience you may have. Our studio offers beginner to advanced mat pilates and yoga classes designed to help you build strength, improve flexibility, and through mindful movement. It doesn’t matter if you are new to fitness or not, our goal is to create a comfortable environment to move.

What Makes Our Studio Special

We offer small-sized group classes that focus on both movement and wellness.  

• Beginner to advanced class selection
• Yoga classes focused on balance and relaxation
• Mat Pilates focused on strength and stability 
• The Wellness Bar, where you can find pre- and post-workout beverages
• Small group classes led by our certified instructors

Supportive Environment 

It’s common that many people feel intimidated when starting their fitness journey in a traditional gym setting. Gym environments have complicated equipment and crowded spaces that make working out feel uncomfortable. Our studio has a goal to offer a supportive environment that will leave you feeling a part of a community.

Start your new fitness journey today by joining a class this week and becoming a part of our wellness community!

Here is a copy of my original version, which wasn’t as well written in the F-Pattern

Mindful Moving Wellness

Welcome to where movement meets mindfulness

Mindful Moving Wellness offers beginner to advanced mat pilates and yoga classes, as well as the Wellness Bar for your pre- and post-workout beverages. At our modern studio, we want you to feel welcome, motivated and confident to move, no matter what level of experience you have. Many beginners often feel overwhelmed when working out in a traditional gym, from the complicated equipment to the crowded spaces. Here at Mindful Moving Wellness, we solve that problem by offering small-group classes for all types of experience in classes that focus on strength, flexibility and wellness. Our classes are guided by highly certified instructors in yoga and pilates, with a focus on ensuring proper form, safety, and taking care of your body through mindful movement. Start your new fitness journey today by joining a class this week and being a part of our wellness community. 

1. We spoke about Plain English writing in class. 

Please answer the following in detail:

a. How would you explain to someone what “Plain English writing” is? (4 Marks)
The best way to explain “Plain English writing” to someone is that it’s writing that is clear and easy to understand. This form of writing avoids any confusing words that may prevent someone from understanding. You can find plain writing in almost everything you read because it helps the reader understand the message quickly, since that’s all their attention span really has. The goal is to accommodate all readers because you don’t know if they enjoy it or not. People don’t want to think when reading, so this is why it is so important to keep in mind when writing content.

b. What makes plain English writing different? (4 Marks)
When thinking about how plain language is different compared to more complex writing, it uses a clear and simple language for someone to understand. When thinking about plain language, all I can think about is how is importoetant to people like myself. Speaking from someone who has dyslexia, reading doesn’t come easily for me. When looking at how it’s different, sentences that are easy to follow make a huge difference in the way I process information. When reading something that has a lot of complex words, it takes a lot longer for the average person to read, which is why it can make such a difference. Additionally, plain language avoids any filler words, which ensures the reader is getting only relevant and helpful information. 

c. What is plain language writing for the web and in detail and in your own words, why is it important? (4 Marks)
Having clear and simple writing on your website helps users quickly understand what they are reading. For the web, you want to be writing for people who skim writing rather than actually read every word. Think about how often you skim and scan when reading because its definty very often. People are looking for useful information, which is why using short paragraphs, strong headings, and a clear call to action is important. In class, we discussed the “inverted pyramid,” where the most important information is placed at the very top of the page or paragraph on your website. This is a way to organize your content and ideas based on the importance (Brisco, W8 – Writing Website Copy & Plain Language Writing (W26).pdf, Slides 12 & 13) because we won’t know how much that person is actually going to read.